While I was working in the visiting area one day, a short, black gang-banger inmate walked in. His brow was furrowed over his dark eyes giving off an aura of pure anger. He stood with his chest puffed out like a man looking for a fight. He wasn't really scary looking, he just seemed angry.
I walked up to him, "Do you have your ID card?" He turned and glared at me like I had just asked him if his mother gave good head. Thinking he might not understand the visiting process I decided to try again.
Me: "Are you here for a visit?"
Inmate: "Yeah."
Me: "Well, I need to see your ID before I can allow you to go into the visiting room.�"
He scowled at me for a few more seconds before he reached in his pocket and pulled out his prison ID. First, I read the name, Jamal Brown, then I looked at the photo. It was definitely Jamal. He was glaring at the camera when they took his picture just like he was glaring at me right now. I thought to myself, "Damn, does this guy always look like this? He must be the angriest black guy in the country. He makes Samuel L. Jackson seem chipper."
I handed Jamal's ID back and asked him if he had read and understood the visiting rules.
Jamal: "Shiiiiiit. Why you gotta' be sweatin' me already? You's a fuckin' racist?"
Me: "No, it's just my job to make sure you know the visiting rules before you have a visit."
Jamal: "Shiiiiiiiit. I know's the mutha-fuckin' rules."
Me: "Ok Mr. Brown, have a nice visit."
Before the conversation was over I knew who I'd be watching for the next hour.
Jamal was visiting with his girlfriend. She was a really polite and quiet girl and it was kind of funny to see them together since she was over a foot taller than him. When he walked into the room she jumped up and gave him a kiss. She had to bend over quite a bit to do so. As their lips met she gave him a bear-hug and nearly lifted him off the ground. I was about to correct them for kissing too long when he pushed away from her. I noticed that a bit of his angry look had returned. I suppose he doesn't like to be picked up. He scanned the room for a moment then directed his girlfriend to one of the small square visiting tables. They took seats next to each other so they could hold hands on the table. It would have been a picture of true love if he didn't look so pissed off.
During their visit I had to interrupt them multiple times to correct him for minor rule violations like excessive kissing, inappropriate groping, and disturbing the other visitors.
Me: "Brown! You can't put your hand under her shirt!"
Jamal: "Shiiiiit. I's bein careful. Nobody's lookin'."
Me: "I don't care. It's against the rules."
Jamal: "Shiiiiiit."
Every time I approached he would flash me with his now trademark 'Angry Eyes' and follow it up with, "Shiiiiiit." which was also soon to be trademarked. The way he said it was almost a sigh, like he was the biggest victim in the world and everyone was here just to pick on him.
After warning him three or four times I finally decided I'd had enough.
Me: "This is your last warning Mr. Brown. If I see you break one more rule I'm going to kick you out. Do you understand?"
Jamal: "Shiiiiit."
I took that as a 'yes'.
The visiting session ended without any further trouble. I escorted the inmates from the visiting room to the area where we strip search them before sending them back to their units.
Now I need to make this extremely clear. I absolutely hate doing strip searches. I swear that I would rather be kicked in the testicles than look at one more disgusting naked inmate. The inmates often claim that being strip searched is dehumanizing for them. Dehumanizing motherfucker? I'll tell you what's dehumanizing. Try looking at one hundred naked, dirty, assholes--literally--a day. I nearly cry just thinking about it. Luckily, I've been able to black out most of those memories.
When Jamal walked into the strip search room I made it a point to hand him a copy of the visiting rules. He gave me another dose of Angry Eyes, followed up with, "Shiiiiiiit."
After the search was completed Jamal crumpled up the visiting rules paper and looked like he was about to throw it away, but then he noticed that I was watching him so he changed his mind and put it in his pocket.
As he walked out the door I called out to him, "Make sure you read those rules!" I'm pretty sure I know what his reply was.
About a week later my new buddy Jamal came walking into the visiting area again, greeting me with another dose of Angry Eyes.
Me: "So Mr. Brown, did you read those rules I gave to you?"
Jamal: "Shiiiiiiit. I knows tha goddamn rules. Why you always sweatin' me?"
Me: "I'm just doing my job. Are we going to have trouble again?"
Jamal: "Shiiiiiiiiit. I'll follow tha mutha-fuckin' rules. Just let me have ma visit."
Me: "Ok, as long as we're on the same page. Have a nice visit."
After he walked away I went into the security room and directed a camera toward his table.
Jamal was visiting with his mother and two of his little brothers. No more than ten minutes into his visit I watched Jamal pass a letter to one of his brothers. I immediately went out to his table and snatched the letter from the boy who gave me a junior version of Angry Eyes.
Me: "What is this?"
Little Brother: "It's jus a letta'. I brought it in wif me."
Me: "No, I watched you take it from Jamal. What is it?"
Jamal: "Why you sweatin' him? He ain't doin' shit!"
Me: "Listen, I watched you give this letter to your brother. If you read the rules you would know that you can't do things like that."
Jamal: "Shiiiiiiiit. I didn't read tha rules, so I didn't know."
Me: "Well, ignorance isn't a viable excuse Mr. Brown. I'm going to have to terminate this visit."
Jamal: "Shiiiiiiit. You is one racist mutha-fucka! I ain't done shit bitch!!!"
Me: "If you ever want to have another visit you better calm down. Tell your family goodbye."
Jamal gave me a serious dose of Angry Eyes, then turned to his family and told them he'd see them in a few weeks.
Another officer took Jamal to the strip search room while I escorted his family out. Once that was done I opened the letter. It was a gang initiation letter for his 12 year old brother.
Not only did he break the rules by trying to pass an item to a visitor, but he was actively trying to recruit his little brother into his gang. After that little stunt Jamal didn't get another visit for three months.
When we finally let him return we put him on barrier visits for three months. A barrier visit takes place in a booth with glass separating the convict and visitor. It's considered a punishment since they don't get to have any physical contact.
About once a week Jamal would come for a visit and give me the Angry Eyes, but he wouldn't talk to me. I didn't hear "Shiiiiiiit" almost the entire time he was on barrier visits.
I finally thought Jamal had gotten the hint since he wasn't arguing with me or breaking any rules. On his last barrier visit I decided to check up on him while he was visiting with his girlfriend, so I snuck up to the door of his booth and listened. After a few minutes I heard this exchange:
Jamal: "Damn baby, you sure is one sexy bitch! I'm gettin' hard jus lookin' at choo!"
Her: "Oh Jamal, you's always gettin' hard."
Jamal: "Yeah baby, I needs some o' that shit. Let me see yo tities."
Her: "No Jamal, we might get caught. You's already in enough trouble."
Jamal: "Shiiiiiiiit. I don' give a fuck."
Her: "Tee-he. Jamal you's being naughty."
Jamal: "You want to see it don' choo? You want me to take it out?"
Her: "Jamal don't, you'll get in trouble."
Then I heard the distinct sound of a zipper.
Jamal: "You like lookin' at it?"
Her: "..."
Jamal: "You want me to put it on the glass for you?"
Her: "..."
Jamal: "How you like that?"
I decided now was as good time as any to make an appearance, so I poked my head into the window. Jamal had one leg up on the counter and appeared to be humping the glass. Jamal's girlfriend saw me immediately and her eyes just about popped out of her head. When I said, "So, what's going on in here?" Jamal jumped up about a foot and quickly zipped up. Too quickly I guess.
Jamal: "FUCK!!!"
Her: "What did you do?"
Jamal: "My dick! My mutha-fuckin' dick!"
I almost collapsed laughing, even though it made me cringe. After a few moments he managed to work it free and zip up his pants. He tried to give me Angry Eyes but I think he was in too much pain at the moment.
I had another officer escort Jamal's girlfriend from the visiting area while I took Jamal out of the booth. He stood in the hallway holding his crotch.
Jamal: "You motha fuckin racisit!"
Me: "You're the one who caught your dick in your zipper."
Jamal: "Fuck you ya racist mutha-fucka!"
I threw some handcuffs on him and had him hauled off to the infirmary so someone could check him out.
The next day I sent Jamal a letter informing him that he was banned from visiting for a year. I could just imagine Jamal reading the letter, Angry Eyes intently deciphering each word, and upon completing the letter sighing, "Shiiiiiiiit."
